


Scared

by Grumpyvitti



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Angst, Does it count as character death if he's just losing all sense of self, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I vote yes, I'm Sorry, Memory Loss, Not Beta Read, and just thought, hey what was eiffel thinking when he got his memory wiped, i was feeling angsty, so here it is, the hera and eiffel is platonic love, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:14:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24812884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grumpyvitti/pseuds/Grumpyvitti
Summary: A character study into what Eiffel was thinking right before he lost all of his memory.Also, please ignore the pretentious imagery i know it's bad i just needed to vent
Relationships: Doug Eiffel/Hera
Kudos: 16





	Scared

Eiffel was doing the right thing, he was.  
So why did it feel like every thought he’d never said was crawling through his throat, desperate nails scratching at his throat, trying to tear the hand off a clock that was always ticking.  
He was going to help his friends, his family, he was going to end this, he was finally doing something with his life, he was going to be the hero.  
So why did he feel the furthest from heroic as he sat there, waiting for Hera to input the final command. He had never been a hero. He was the blundering fool who stumbled through life, a drunken sprawl, tripping over other’s lives and messing them up with his clumsy attempts at love.  
God, he was not a hero. Minkowski was a hero, Hera was a hero, Lovelace hell even Jacobi, they were heroes, the sort to shine so brightly generations would name their constellations after them. Eiffel had never been like them, and he had been fine with that, he wasn’t the sort to inspire songs, he had never done anything good in him life, had only drowned himself in sorrows not realizing that with every bottle he drunk, he was stalling regrets that would one day resurface.  
But now is not the time to reflect and self-pity and hope and dream and plan, Eiffel. No. That time came and went with not even a greeting for you to notice it by. Now was the time to be a hero so what would the Commander say? What would the Captain do? What would Hera fix?  
As these thoughts raced by, Hera finished the final bit of code, a delete button for the thinking, living Eiffel before her.  
So, as Pryce stepped back into his head, Eiffel stopped wandering what his family would do and just did what he did best.  
He laughed. He laughed because he was doing the right thing, but he still felt so, so scared. He did not want to leave, and ever untold thought was crawling through his throat, just as desperate to be remembered as the one who thought it.  
Finally, with one final click of a button, the final thought Eiffel would ever have broke through the teeming mounds of scared, soon-to-be forgotten half-thought apologies, tearing itself from his bloodied throat  
‘And Hera-,’ I love you…


End file.
